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To put it simply, this is nothing. At first, you laid out a flow chart for directions a conversation could go, which sounds exactly like how their conversations already naturally unfold. You then proceeded to write out your extremely corny Legion of Skanks fan fiction day dream fantasy. Useless, dorky, creepy. Straight out of the Rupert Pupkin playbook. The #1 thing you don’t want to do when submitting content ideas to a free form talk show, is to submit in any way your idea of how a conversation could unfold.

“So then Bill asks the intern what he ate for breakfast. And if the intern says he had Lucky Charms, Jerry can say ‘What are you 5 years old??’ and then you guys can go off on his childish breakfast for a while!!”

Nobody cares about your fantasy riff ideas. The professional comedians have that part covered. It’s the number one thing your mind should never be submitting ideas for.

When you’re submitting something to a talk show, it needs to be ideas for bits and games, things that spark discussion. You had none of that. It’s just you telling them to bring you on to be part of the wacky fun. If they didn’t have a lie detector already, then you could say “I think you should buy a lie detector and make the staff take tests, it will definitely lead somewhere funny.” That would be an idea. Your idea, was to say “You know that bit you do? What if you did it with me? Here are some of the crazy things I would say!”. That is NOT an idea. It’s just you wanting to be on the show. That’s the number two thing you should never do, is pitch an idea that’s all about you and your participation with the show.

Are you really 20? If so, I get it. You’re young and eager and want to be part of a fun thing. But this isn’t the way to do it. My advice is that if you really want to do something to influence a show, adopt a producers’ mindset and think of a good game or bit that the hosts could get some mileage out of. Think “Who’s Most Justified Saying The N word?”. Simple concept, sparks discussion, makes it easy for the hosts to riff and be funny. Ideas of that ilk are what you need to be thinking up and submitting as show ideas. I hope you find this more helpful than hurtful. Good luck bro.